Friday, March 29, 2013
It is Ok to Be Mad, (Infertility Post)
With spring around the corner, and babies being conceived or born everywhere it is hard to not get mad at the world as you wonder why this is not happening to you. These feeling are natural and expected. What really matters is how you deal with it. Anger, disappointment, and the unfairness of the world are feelings that are healthy. However, these feelings should not be directed at others or at yourself. Instead try to focus those feelings to the situation.
Feeling angry and disappointed means that you may be less inclined to be happy for others in their pregnancy. Again this is a natural feeling, the best way to deal with this is to learn to say no, also learn to better communicate your feelings. Just because you don't want to go baby shopping with them twice a week and don't want to host the baby shower does not mean that you do not want to attend the baby shower and wouldn't mind throwing out some ideas every once in a while. Find where your comfort level is and be open and honest about it. Also, as I have learned be open and honest while using tact. That is something I haven't quite mastered personally.
Relax yourself doing things that your pregnant friends can't do. This means going to Sushi, a bar, playing at the beach, or even eating a hot dog. While it may be small and petty and your friends will probably never know, it might help you feel better about the whole situation. Even small things like this can help you get through the season.
If you are in a place and situation to be able to adopt a pet, try doing so. If you already have a pet, spend more time with them. While doing this may not take away all the feeling from not having a child, it can help.
The last suggestion is to be open and honest with your partner on how you are feeling and why you are feeling that way. Never try to hide those types of feelings. This situation includes both of you and you should be able to talk to them about why you are feeling the way you are feeling. Who knows it may even bring you and your partner closer together.